Bang Fish
Bang-Fish
boomfish.jpg
One I caught a couple seconds before it blew
Type Threat Level
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Active Status Other Names
blank.png Boomers, "Sunfish?"
Description:

(edited because Hank is a lazy piece of shit) Bang-fish are deep sea critters that have holes cut straight through their bodies. Other than the holes, they look like regular pomfrets. The holes are like someone took a cookie cutter straight through them, but don't bleed. When you fish them out of the water, you hear the hissing of gas escaping. Then the fish explodes into a little fireball. It's loud and it gets fried fish guts everywhere - can singe your hand too, if you're not careful. It looks like the gas being exposed to air might be doing it, or maybe the difference in pressure from being underwater to being out of it. DUNKING THEM BACK INTO THE FRESHWATER DOES NOT STOP THEM FROM BLOWING UP. I’m not going to be responsible for any more blown-open tackle boxes, so STOP TRYING.

Background: Sailors in San Diego have been complaining about singe marks and bits of fried fish splattered across their hulls for years. At one point, a school of Bang-fish converged towards a dry dock at the San Diego naval base. My theory is that they were going for the aluminum components of the ship. It's that somehow, whenever I'm not looking for Bang-fish, I put little squares of aluminum foil on my line as a flasher. There's not supposed to be light down that far, but almost always, I pull one of those stupid bombs back up. Anyways, the blast almost scuttled a battleship near the dock and from what I hear, nobody saw another Bang-fish for a damn near decade. Friend in the navy sent me this picture.

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The Kumeyaay people passed down stories of angry fish-gods that could be used to sink other canoes and could be used to scare off demons. They were probably talking about Bang-fish.

I don’t know if this is where you put it, but these fish seem like they do something with the gas other than turn to fish and chips. I think the gas is for dealing with the pressure underwater, but I’ve seen the Bang-fish spit out jets of flames sometimes before they blow. Maybe it's a hunting method or something. Have no idea how they use it underwater though.

Location and Population: Right off the coast of San Diego is where I find them, but not too many people cast their lines that deep. They don't fall for lobster traps either. The other warders on the eastern seaboard haven't reported anything like this, so I think it's safe to say this it's specifically in the deeps of San Diego. Maybe they even live in the open ocean? I'll need to take a fishing boat out to check, but I'm not feeling too confident about going that far out.

Hunting or Procurement Methods: As soon as you reel it up, the fish stops moving. You hear a hiss, and that's your cue to either dunk it back into water or get your eyebrows singed off. Generally after around 2-3 seconds, the fish chunks itself. If you toss it back into the water all it does is make a big bubble and splash some warm water on you.

Of all the fish that I've eaten, this one has the weirdest flavor - tastes like a mixture of french fries, tin foil, and sulfur.

Encounter Records: N/A

Additonal Notes: N/A

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