Dead God
Dead God
dead_baby_god.jpg
Type
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Threat Level
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Active Status
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Other Names
N/A

Description: There's no way to put this lightly, so… I think I encountered a baby death god in my backyard. I uploaded a drawing to the page. It might not be fully accurate but it's the best I can remember of my experiences. I will now chronicle the harrowing event:

Background: It started when I was making dinner. Yes, I did hear a loud thump outside, but no, I didn't go to see what had happened. I was making dinner. And I was going to keep making dinner too, until the vegetables started to rot in my hand. It was like the decomposition rate had increased exponentially. Everything became moldy, black, and gooey in front of my eyes, like someone had decided to end all life right then and there. The wooden boards of my house began to creak, splinter, and go soft. The brittle windows shattered, and insects drifted through to their deaths on dust particles and broken wings. I prayed for my life, begging God or someone else to let me be the last person alive, so that I might be the one to go on a journey to cleanse the land of rot and bring forth a new world of infinite spring waters and endless acres of cherry trees. Unfortunately, it was getting a bit dusty in there. I had to go outside to clear my lungs.

The outside world had quickly become just as desolate as I imagined. The grass crunched beneath my shoes, in a way that I don't think healthy grass ever should. In the distance, I could see the plague spreading, as trees lost their leaves and toppled, birds desperately searching for a safe place to land. It was dark. So dark and cold, because the sun was sick too. And I was still hungry.

There was a crater in the grass. Inside was a creature I can still only describe as a god, or demon, or something else unnatural, and by some coincidence it was now lying in my backyard. It was weak, pulsating and wriggling, an infantile black mass of putrid flesh and death made true. It reached out a hand to brush a falling leaf, which dried and turned to dust in its grasp. Our eyes met. I was afraid, and I think it may have been afraid of me too, but I also felt like in that moment, I was responsible for whatever happened next.

Nothing had happened to me yet, as far as I could tell, so I simply picked up the infant god and carried it back inside. It was still too young to do anything but tug at my decaying clothes. The prospects of dinner weren't looking very good at that point, which only made the end of the world that much more disappointing. There was nothing left to eat, and I wasn't hungry enough to eat myself yet. Of course, there was a more pressing matter at hand - disposing of the child, which appeared to be a simple task in its unformed state. As I reached for the kitchen knife to end its horrid life, a second thought occurred to me. Meat is meat, after all. I placed the monster on the table and cut off its head.


Additional Notes: The baby god actually tasted pretty good for something that looked like death incarnate. It made me a bit queasy, but if you cut around the rotten bits, there's some decent red meat. Kinda tastes like sausage. I actually made a stew out of it. If any of you are near the Claridon County area in Ohio, feel free to come by, since I still have a little bit left. It's going fast, though!

I feel like I could destroy everything.


Update: I ate the rest of the soup, sorry.


Comment — 5-14-2007
Holy shit, are you okay? If you need help, I'll drop everything right now to drive out there to get you. Please respond
- Anonymous

> Reply — 5-14-2007
Oh, yeah - I typed this in a bit of a rush but everything went back to normal after I killed it. It's actually a very nice day outside. I think some people a few houses down are still freaking out about it but they should be fine.
- Rudy (The Author)

Comment — 5-14-2007
Why…, why would you eat that?
- Anonymous

> Reply — 5-14-2007
My mother always taught me not to waste.
- Rudy (The Author)

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