Easter Bunny
Easter Bunny
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Looks like something from a Disney movie up close.
Type Threat Level
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Active Status Other Names
blank.png "Bunny", "Egger", "Hare", "Rabbit"

Description: For many people, modern holidays feel quite shallow; mere carcasses of their former meaning. They might blame this on various factors: materialism, children, stress… things like those. The Easter Bunny, however, is the monster to put them all to shame.

Anthropomorphic rabbit man - probably about average human height and build, but the strength of its legs says otherwise. Clothing varies, but is usually described as "seasonally appropriate." Whatever level of intelligence it has is up for debate, but further than basic instinct.

On its own, the bunny isn't anything special, if one can call a cryptid "normal." If there wasn't a catch, we'd probably be using it for target practice. It has a bizarre affinity towards birds and their eggs, for the purposes of collection. It typically targets chickens, likely for the sake of availability, but ducks, owls, turkeys, quails, and anything else big enough to hold in two hands seem to be fair game.

Comment — 3-20-2017
We don't call Peter Rabbit here "The Easter Bunny" as a cutesy reference. Believe me, I wish it was that simple.

The rabbit, during a scavenging session, has a tendency to acquire eggs in a morbid fashion. Any nests or storages it comes across will be completely picked clean. If the nests are empty, or there are no eggs present at all, it will squeeze the abdomen of a captured bird in an attempt to acquire them by force. This often results in severe injury or death to the affected bird, regardless of the outcome. Cracked or broken eggs are discarded on-site.

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Sometimes things don't go according to plan.

Much to its namesake, the Easter Bunny will then decorate its surroundings with the collected eggs. We usually find eggs in groups, with various colorations and decorations. Nothing like the cheerful stuff you'd actually see at Easter; instead of bright colors we usually get berry stains, mud, and old ribbons. But damn, does it leave a lot of them.

Background: Originally we toyed around with the idea that it might just be a weird guy in a suit with a lot of free time on his hands. That was the story back in 1989. Someone was breaking into chicken coops to make a shittier version of Easter and eventually the police would deal with it if we didn't find him first. Unfortunately, a man in a rabbit suit doesn't outrun several police cars at 60 mph. The real origin is spotty at best, and tons of theories remain unsolved. It could be an old animal that inspired the Easter egg tradition, or maybe just a coincidence, or even a fully intelligent creature that's mercilessly fucking with people. Among most of the locals, however, it's still just a man in the woods.

Comment — 9-27-2009
I'm definitely glad that video didn't make it to the news stations, don't get me wrong, but you have to admit that police chase was pretty funny. Can anyone upload that file here?

Location and Population: The Easter Bunny resides somewhere along the border of North Carolina and South Carolina. Current estimate is somewhere between Fayetteville and Dillon. It's likely that it changes homes every few months, though there is very little evidence of activity outside of early springtime. Findings in the countryside support the idea that it digs burrows as shelter, like a normal rabbit. Unconfirmed, but it's possible that the Easter Bunny hibernates for large portions of the year, explaining its disappearances. The Goose Chase Outfit1 volunteers to be the primary source of contact for tracking the bunny in this region.

Comment — 10-11-2018
Do we have any sources on how big the burrows are? I know someone in Goose Chase found one that was hardly big enough to fit two people.

Hunting or Procurement Methods: During the Easter Bunny's "active" season2, Warders are permitted to shoot on sight. Whether the aberration is recovered dead or alive is of no consequence. The eggs it distributes should be used as a way to track it, but we encourage Warders to eventually destroy them as a method of discouragement. Farmers in the region will sometimes pay for guard services during the active season, so watch for advertisements or additional incentives. Rewards and trophies are first come, first serve, and remember that cryptozoological societies might be willing to pay for its capture.

Encounter Records: Any personal sightings, encounters, or evidence can be put here for future reference.

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Comment — 4-21-2015
I found these outside Wark's farm. Any idea what the hell they're covered in?
- GC Rick

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Comment — 5-5-2015
Hey, good news! Our little holiday abomination forgot to hide something and I managed to recover the quail eggs. They're real pretty too.
- GC Mori

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Comment — 4-3-2017
I found this in the woods. Anyone think it might be related? Someone or something broke into Whole Foods yesterday.
- Anonymous

Reply — 4-5-2017
At least they're clean, I guess.
- GC Mori

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Comment — 5-23-2018
what the fuck
- GC Alea

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