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on god?

by JerryJohnJerryJohn, 25 Jun 2019 16:04
by EskobarEskobar, 24 Jun 2019 12:30

I’ll probably limit the area of effect and make it a unique phenomenon or maybe a more physical threat. Maybe a town perhaps? The method/creature type isn’t as important as what it is supposed to do. And you’re right they probably would not, so I’ll maybe make it another category.

bruh this a little too blatant

Too esoteric I think, this is such a wide spread idea, how would only the warders figure this out? Do they have ghostbuster equipment?

Re: The Spirit of Burnout by BlairinBlairin, 23 Jun 2019 18:09

Some say that whenever you wish to become a great artisan and are divinely inspired, that when you want to start your path towards the high arts, you are vulnerable to the influences of the Spectres of Burnout.

How does it function?
Someone tries their hand at their dream, and they genuinely believe they can make it. Maybe making a novel, or starting a series of paintings which they wish to get famous doing. This person, if they feel enough doubt, and a Spectre of Burnout is nearby, it will latch onto them, slowly taking away their want to achieve their goal. Even after all desire to stop pursuing their goal has stopped, the Spectre of Burnout will begin to keep latching onto them, sometimes until the individual's death. The influence moves from just their hobby to their everything else. Family relationships, friendships, and even spreads to their work ethic. All until they are finally on their deathbed, where they too will become a Spectre of Burnout, starting the cycle over again until they are appeased.







oh yeah yeah

by JimmyBoyHahaJimmyBoyHaha, 21 Jun 2019 05:00

what the fuck have you brought upon this cursed land

by moist breadmoist bread, 20 Jun 2019 00:13
WydnessWydness 19 Jun 2019 20:21
in discussion Hidden / Per page discussions » Canon Policy

I'm really excited to see how our site lore will change in the future. I'd absolutely love to see Wayward develop a timeline of events.

by WydnessWydness, 19 Jun 2019 20:21

I agree with Jerry on this one. I've looked it over personally and it feels like you've taken Slenderman and put a wicked smile on him. I suggest perhaps replacing some of the abilities characteristic of Slenderman with something else. Even then, in the original story, teleporting around and static vision wasn't really all that complicated, and I feel as though you could find something easily as interesting. If you need ideas you can go on websites which randomly generate paranormal effects.

As for what Jerry, said, again, I feel as though this monster could use a little more background and personality. You attempt to do something unique with the body snatching at the end, but you don't play it up anywhere else in the article and it just feels kind of tacked on. And as for how the article is written itself as a whole, I feel as though it could do with just a little less of a personal angle, but not too much.

I think this could do with a going back to the drawing board to be honest, or refining what you have currently heavily, but I'm just one person.

Re: The Whooper by Creak Cronk CrunkCreak Cronk Crunk, 19 Jun 2019 19:46

I think it's good to comment on pages so I'll post my thoughts from the Discord server here for visibility:

I think this is, overall, kinda boring. Neither the Description, the Background, nor the Location sections really grabbed my attention. They just feel…. flat. The information is presented very briefly and plainly.

I've been thinking about the exploration logs too - while I think they help to give visual insight into the hallucinations described early in the article, there's a problem here, and it's something I've also been criticized for in my own writing. The final comment about being unable to determine the authenticity of the journals is not helpful. It creates more questions than answers, and in a bad way.

Should you revise this, I would be more than happy to revisit it. I don't at all have a problem with coldposting, like I've said before, but I think this time, with something so experimental, a trip to the draft forums would have been a good idea.

Edit: Revisions have been made and I am changing my vote from 2 stars to 3 stars for now.

Florida Canon Part 3 by WydnessWydness, 19 Jun 2019 01:24
RogetRoget 19 Jun 2019 00:27
in discussion Hidden / Per page discussions » Wakulla Volcano,_Florida_(11465121044).jpg

Public Domain

This is yet another Florida myth article, sick of them yet?

Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!

by RogetRoget, 19 Jun 2019 00:27

So this article is written alright. There's nothing really bad or really good about it. I do think you overuse the parenthesis a lot throughout the article, when it would make it a much smoother read to couch things using commas. The biggest problem I have with this article is that it feels like Slenderman with a slightly different gimmick. There's not a lot that separates this from the internet creepypasta. I think I'd be fine to have something like this if you gave him a sort of deeper backstory, something that goes beyond the generic "ancient tribe legend" trope. Maybe have a really freaky story written from the perspective of someone from that ancient tribe or give the Whooper some sort of personal backstory that pertains to its past life?

Re: The Whooper by JerryJohnJerryJohn, 18 Jun 2019 22:32

Actually, I think I'll make this both a contests and publications thread, because 8-10 cents per word is some damn good money.

I have to plug here a physical periodical that I get, Asimov's Science Fiction, which is a long-standing organization that buys original stories year-round to publish in their once-every-two-months-publication (which ranges from poetry to short stories to novellas):

Not sure if the last sentence of the caption is needed. In the first quote from the spokeperson you might want capitalize "Ranger" in "by the sheriff, an ex-ranger". "Norman" also need to be capitalized. I like the look of the reward ticket, though the sides seem a tad too wide.
The beginning sentence of the Outfit's notes seems a bit stilted in comparison to the rest of the section. I can't think of a problem or anything niggling in my head about the section beyond that.
In the description the reporting Warder mentions that the appearance of fog matches the traumatized woman's own report. Since the original victim's report is not in its entirety in the article and is merely paraphrased for the bounty it's fine. Just remember some readers may think it comes out of nowhere or is a bit tacked on.
In the enounter section, "…we were due for another aberrant job later…", aberrant needs to be capitalized. This sentence, "We noticed that the proceeding time we visited, we recorded video of it watching us from slightly closer than before." is not exactly the most coherent even with the parathetical section removed.
Some of the Victim Log collapsable needs to be changed. "Randy proceeds lay down…", you're missing a to in there. You also shouldn't use names in the actual action bits; this is mostly because you only do it for Randy and don't name him when he speaks and just merely put "Man:". You need to choose if you're going to use names for the log or not beyond the actual dialogue and include Martha in the schema.
Reading over the Banishment log, I realized something. You need to comb over your designations for the members of the Outfit. It keeps switching between TM-3 to BH-3 to TH-3 all throughout the article. I'm assuming TH is the designation you're going with. As a final note you should probably change the ative status from Pacified to destroyed, since it's unlikely for the curse/spirit to come back from beyond the veil.

I don't know how good or bad this might come off. Don't be afraid to be honest.

The Druid of Maine by Creak Cronk CrunkCreak Cronk Crunk, 17 Jun 2019 14:57

My aim was to write an article where a Warder fought an Aberrant one on one. Time to get bloody.

Blood Raker by Hot SpringsHot Springs, 17 Jun 2019 06:54
WydnessWydness 16 Jun 2019 04:23
in discussion Hidden / Per page discussions » The Divisma

This has some of the coolest concepts I've seen in a wayward article before. Between the ((spoilers?)) very original concept of the aberration, Forest Grandfather-like interview, greater story about a corporation exploiting a supernatural phenomenon for money, and terrifying imagery of the second page, I'm left speechless. Unfortunately…. they fit together like ketchup and chocolate. It felt like something different was happening in every single iteration of the page, and that's why I can't rate this positively. 2 stars.

by WydnessWydness, 16 Jun 2019 04:23
EskobarEskobar 16 Jun 2019 03:07
in discussion Hidden / Per page discussions » The Divisma
by EskobarEskobar, 16 Jun 2019 03:07

In a way, ward society is what we live in.

by VizloxVizlox, 16 Jun 2019 00:03
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